Musings on Tango, Sensuality and Spirituality
aydan.tango Happy Anniversary, “Naked” Tangueros!
Correct me if I am wrong but I believe this October is our 5th year of dancing at Naked Cafe?!
What started out as ½ dozen stalwarts evolved relatively quickly into a weekly gathering of 15-25 weekly dancers (in addition to a ½ doz adventurous souls coming early for a lesson). I call this a rousing success, by Edmonton terms.
Which begs the question: What makes for a healthy and sustainable community?
There is something quite magical about dancing with others in synchronized movement. Whether it’s purely for enjoyment, for fitness, or as part of a ceremony, dancing with a group will most likely leave you with an ear-to-ear grin or feeling deeply stirred and part of something sacred. It blurs the lines between the perception of “self” and “other” and leads to a bond between participants.
Tango is special among the partner dances because it requires such a deep level of conscious connection. One must be attuned at all times to not only the outer dance: the music, the steps, your partner’s positioning, but also your inner dance….
“There are four foundational needs of our psyche: to be seen, to be listened to, to connect and to belong.” Reginald A. Ray, PhD, cofounder and spiritual director of Dharma Ocean Foundation.
Dance generally and Tango specifically is a conversation: an opportunity to be listened to, to be attended to, to be held, to feel supported. We are massaged inside and out through the engagement with partner and music.
There are four foundational needs of our psyche: to be seen, to be listened to, to connect and to belong.
I cannot think of any social activity that offers a better possibility of addressing all four of these needs than the Tango.
Tango is not the answer!
It does, however, raise a whole set of fascinating, soul-searching questions. The questions we ask of the tango will determine what we get from the dance (excepting of course, all those delicious and unsettling surprises). Questions keep us persevering when it would be far saner to stay on the couch and nurse one’s fragile ego.
This is the clarion call. Man equals hunter-gatherer equals warrior equals combatant equals equals consumer no longer sustains relationships or life on this planet.
Time to change. Trade in those skates and cleats for dance shoes.
Guys, the deck has been stacked against us.
OK. Not all men. Maybe just me, and those of you with similiar backgrounds and upbringings: White, North American, marginal parenting, maybe a little religion sprinkled in, with a strong emphasis on sports and machismo and little on arts and of course none on dance except to diss it.
All of which amounts to not only shaming or discouraging dance but a conflicted relationship with our bodies generally.
To quote Carlos Gavito, which I do regularly : “We share the lead. I lead for part of the step and then my partner responds in her own time, in her own way. I wait and then I follow.”
This style of call and response is very complex and requires not only refined technique and attention to the music but also an awareness of your partner’s positioning and responsiveness. … Intuitive is the world typically used to describe how the follow responds to the lead.
But there is another, even more fascinating style of communication that I am quite convinced happens in tango….I believe that good dancers communicate telepathically….
Carlos Gavito: “The secret of tango is in this moment of improvisation that happens between the steps.”
The heart of the dance is not the steps but what happens between the steps, where there is no movement, only stillness.