The One Thing

“We search for something that will seem like truth to us; we search for understanding; we search for that principle which keys us deeply into the pattern of all life; we search for the relations of things.”  The Log from the Sea of Cortez, John Steinbeck (February 27, 1902–December 20, 1968) 

“Blessed are those with singleness of vision for they shall see the One Thing.” Matt 5:8 (ADV’s secular rendition.)

“The greatest challenge of the day is: how to bring about a revolution of the heart,”—Dorothy Day, Loaves and Fishes 

In one of our family’s classic movie moments*, Jack Palance, a.k.a. “Curly,” the iconic cleft-chinned cowboy, responds to Billy Crystal’s question: “What is the meaning of life?” Sitting tall in his saddle Curly holds up his index finger and answers “One thing,” and then slumps over dead. *(City Slickers, 1991).

We are left to imagine our own answer. 

The passing of the years has had a crisping effect on my image of “the one thing”. Perhaps it is as William Blake said, “Even a fool if he persists long enough in his folly, will become wise.” This old fool may actually be gaining some wisdom for all his foolhardiness through the years. Maybe it is that my interest in “shiny things” and other distractions is waning with age.

At the end of a day, lying in bed, Patricia and I add up our marbles, revisit the losses and gains, the aches and pains, the disappointments and diminishments. Not necessarily a sweet dreams sign-off. Then she adds, “Yes, but we get to cuddle at night  with the one we love.” I mutter agreement and then spoon in behind.

Indeed, this is as good as life gets. As close as we may ever get to the one thing.

But my soul-sight is not always that clear, typically clouded. I get preoccupied with to-do lists and political atrocities and sports scores and squiggly marks on my bank ledger sheet. I need continual reminding of what is important in life, the golden thread that weaves its way through discordant life experiences, tying them together, the relations of things, as John Steinbach says.

“Connection gives our lives meaning and offers joy, even in the dark [of the unknown]… We open to our interconnectedness with all beings …. ” [1] LaUra Schmidt with Aimee Lewis Reau and Chelsie Rivera, How to Live in a Chaotic Climate: Ten Steps to Reconnect with Ourselves, Our Communities, and Our Planet (Boulder, CO: Shambhala, 2023), 11, 12. 

To compensate for my blurred vision I develop habits – practices and beliefs – that keep me focused on what is truly important, such as prayer and meditation, tai chi, nature outings, gardening, cuddling, smooching, and music – practices that integrate mind and body so that the wisdom becomes visceral. 

And of course Tango.

The enchantment for me these days with Tango is that it is one of the key places in my life where story and practice, mind and body come together succinctly in a way that enlarges my heart.  Apart from family gatherings, I have few other occasions which allow for such soul-affirming engagement. I come away feeling more connected with myself and others. 

Tango bridges the gap between the broadly social and deeply personal. It takes me forward in the search for “that principle which keys us deeply into the pattern of all life; for the relations of things.”

Dance Movement Therapy explores this connectivity at the core of dance: 

This connection is something that Merleau-Ponty calls reversibility… perceiver and the perceived do not stand in a static and oppositional mode of existence, but continuously intertwine. (Merleau-Ponty 1968, 168.) Chiasm is the concept with which Merleau-Ponty describes the intertwining, the reversible exchange between my flesh and other flesh, (Ibid.,134.) This mutual blending is found at every level of experience…(Merleau-Ponty 4 1968, 131.) Other flesh: embodiment in couple and group dances, Petri Hoppu. Published 2013 in Nordic Journal of Dance, Vol. 4 (2), 32–45. 

The Tango as a dance is the practice of relating, of listening and attuning to another, of bringing one’s inner dancer into deep engagement with another. All of which are skills that enhance connection in the rest of one’s life. 

When you are moving in synchrony with another and with the music, you may just be closing in on the one thing