Musings on Tango, Sensuality and Spirituality
aydan.tango 
The national day of tango commemorates the birth of two legends of tango: the immortal legend Carlos Gardel, perhaps the most famous tango singer of all times, and genius orchestra conductor Julio de Caro: both born on Dec. 11th.
An amazing quality of Tango is that it allows us to explore relational dynamics in a safe and controlled venue. We have the opportunity to unlearn anti-social or abusive habits and scripting, and replace them with behaviours that support healthy non-sexualized connection.
I believe that dance generally and tango specifically, is an effective corrective to the oppositional, polarized, sexualized nature of our society, and by extension to domestic violence. It teaches an entirely different model of relating, one which affirms cooperative and complementary effort. Both parties should leave the dance floor with a smile.
It is our pursuit of beauty, meaning, joy in the midst of atrocities that will transform our soul and the soul of humanity into one of compassion, gentleness, understanding and tolerance: One in which the immigrant is always welcome and those wounded in love and war find solace in a warm embrace and soft turns on the dance floor. This is the alchemy of tango.
It is no secret that the Tango raises issues, pushes buttons, brings to the surface deeply submerged feelings of self-doubt and insecurity, sensuality and sexuality – all of which tend to trip us up, both in our dance or relationships.
Mindfulness is an essential element of what draws people to tango. I have had trouble through the years of knowing the difference between fun and mindful euphoria, and it has become clear as I have a regular meditative practice. Without the meditative, mindful part in tango, we may have a fun time but this fun will go by all too fast. Mindfulness brings a time-slowing euphoria.
What makes for a memorable tango dance, something you take home with you and warms your heart for a day or two after, maybe even gives you some insights into the subtleties of relationships?
Tango is about feeling and sensitivity, otherwise you are just doing gymnastics. You can do all the steps but it has to have the feeling and sensitivity of authentic tango.” — Carlos Gavito
This is how we dance in Buenos Aires, in the small clubs, where the lights are dim and the floor is crowded and you are dancing with a stranger. There you do not care how it looks. No one is watching.
You care how it feels. Feeling is more important than form, than fancy steps. You go with the feel of the music, the flow of the floor, the warmth of your partner’s body against yours. This is milonguero. This is tango.
An excellent list of practices to keep in mind when dancing tango. The goal is always to make this a pleasurable experience for yourself and partner. Compiled by Ilona Milonguera with input from other instructors in the Toronto area and beyond.
Tango as a spiritual discipline has the power to teach us to appreciate beauty, create with our bodies, reverence physical connection and intimacy, respect boundaries, and be attuned to our partner,…