Dancing With a Child’s Mind

The inspiration for this blog is a brilliant post from www.DailyOm.com “Learning to Follow” (included below in full), that encourages us to approach and inhabit everything we do, including dancing Tango, with a child’s mind. 

“(Children) live their lives fully immersed in the present moment, seeing everything with the open-mindedness born of unknowing. This enables them to inhabit a state of spontaneity, curiosity, and pure excitement about the world that we, as adults, have a hard time accessing. “

Is this true about your Tango dancing? 

So many dancers repeatedly express the frustration of getting stuck in their heads and missing the beauty of the moment or the joy that comes from folding into the music and synchronously moving with one’s partner.

We have a hard time emptying our minds of ego concerns like getting it right, impressing our teacher or looking good enough to garner our next cabaceo or mirada. 

Yet being completely in the moment, not anticipating the next move or worrying about the last mistake, and surrendering judgements and self-consciousness to the bliss of the moment, is Tango Nirvana. It is what transforms Tango from a technical exercise into a soulful meditation.  

Experiencing every moment with wide-eyed wonder as if for the first time = the beginner’s or child’s mind – has been taught throughout the millennia by spiritual teachers and traditions: “Unless you become like little children you will not pass through the gates of heaven.” Jesus of Nazareth. Chan Park’s little book Tango Zen: Walking Dance Meditation (Tango Zen House, 2004) is a fascinating insight into the meaning and value of Tango when danced as a Zen meditation.

How does this happen?

Not without lots of time spent in your head practicing. But the goal is to develop a body-mind awareness which directs consciously one’s movements without critical reflection or judgment.“Technique – bodily control – must be mastered only because the body must not stand in the way of the soul’s expression.” La Meri, Tango Zen. 

The goal of one’s dance experience is to weave together threads of knowledge, experience, and intuition with loving intention and heat-based caring. 

DailyOm Post.

As grown-ups, we often approach children with ideas about what we can teach them about this life. It’s true that we have important information to convey, but children are here to teach us — just as much as we are here to teach them. They are so new to the world and far less burdened with preconceived notions about the people, situations, and objects they encounter. They do not avoid people on the basis of appearance. They can be fascinated for half an hour with a pot and a lid, and they are definitely not self-conscious in their emotional expressions. They live their lives fully immersed in the present moment, seeing everything with the open-mindedness born of unknowing. This enables them to inhabit a state of spontaneity, curiosity, and pure excitement about the world that we, as adults, have a hard time accessing. Yet, almost every spiritual path calls us to rediscover this way of seeing. In this sense, children truly are our gurus.

When we approach children with the awareness that they are our teachers, we automatically become more present ourselves. We have to be more present when we follow — looking, listening, and responding to their lead. We don’t lapse so easily into the role of the director of activities, surrendering instead to having no agenda at all. As we allow our children to determine the flow of play, they pull us deeper into the mystery of the present moment. In this magical place, we become innocent again, not knowing what will happen next and remembering how to let go and flow.

Since we also must embody the role of a loving guide, our children teach us how to transition gracefully from following to leading and back again. In doing so, we learn to dance with our children in the present moment, shifting and adjusting as we direct the flow from pretending to be kittens wearing shoes on our heads to making sure everyone is fed and bathed